Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize