Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize