I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Randomize
