oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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