Quick, to the slutcave!
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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