The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize