I wanna bring you to show and tell
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Randomize
