I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
