She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Randomize
