Nicole vs. Life
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Randomize
