is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
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