there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
