So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
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