In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
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She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
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True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??