I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
there was a trapeze. enough said
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
You made out with two different species that night
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize