No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Randomize
