Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
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