I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
So much Jack, so little girl.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
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