party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Randomize
