Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
