whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
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