Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
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