What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
