the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
