I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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