just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
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