in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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