You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Randomize
