Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
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