Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I look better un-naked...
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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