I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
time to smoke my breakfast
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
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