So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Its about making memories worth repressing
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize
