I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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