i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
Randomize