Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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