it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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