is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize