They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I wish my new phone didn't autocorrect so well. People will never experience the magic of my drunk texts because they think I'm making a coherent statement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize