This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
