oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Randomize
