dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
The power of my boobs compel you
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
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