She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize