Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
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