It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Randomize
