ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I seem to have left my pride at pride
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Randomize
