Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
be right there i have to get my cape
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
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