They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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