i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
