WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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