i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Randomize
