So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
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