Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf? http://tfl.nu/d12x
  Replies (44) Good night (713) Bad night (6652)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming! http://tfl.nu/wucs
  Replies (9) Good night (2908) Bad night (635)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.

  (1-813): View more from Florida

  Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (813): I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type. (1-813): Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type. http://tfl.nu/055q
  Replies (90) Good night (7957) Bad night (1625)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.

  (720): View more from Colorado

  ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...

  (917): View more from New York City

  no it doesn't.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (917): you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere. (720): ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning... (917): no it doesn't. http://tfl.nu/6x89
  Replies (34) Good night (18468) Bad night (1312)
• Favorite

  (907): View more from Alaska

  started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (907): started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night. http://tfl.nu/6i6d
  Replies (20) Good night (1097) Bad night (4972)
• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (843): We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again http://tfl.nu/w71h
  Replies (23) Good night (917) Bad night (3393)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (908): You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you? http://tfl.nu/3hav
  Replies (11) Good night (2321) Bad night (1475)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good. http://tfl.nu/fc7j
  Replies (1) Good night (693) Bad night (1267)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner. http://tfl.nu/srex
  Replies (6) Good night (2401) Bad night (725)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (616): I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am... http://tfl.nu/z53a
  Replies (18) Good night (1573) Bad night (569)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably. http://tfl.nu/2r5e
  Replies (11) Good night (1374) Bad night (437)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest? http://tfl.nu/jsvy
  Replies (7) Good night (839) Bad night (507)
• Favorite

  (352): View more from Florida

  As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (352): As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back http://tfl.nu/26q8
  Replies (5) Good night (1388) Bad night (534)
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (613): but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost http://tfl.nu/7k22
  Replies (2) Good night (402) Bad night (985)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic. http://tfl.nu/ch95
  Replies (3) Good night (551) Bad night (313)

Randomize